Books Come As You Are: Revised and Updated: The Surprising New Science That Will Transform Your Sex Life   Emily Nagoski PhD (Author)

"Come As You Are: Revised and Updated: The Surprising New Science That Will Transform Your Sex Life" by Emily Nagoski PhD is a science-based book about female sexuality that challenges myths and offers empowering insights. The book explains that every woman has a unique sexual response, likened to a fingerprint, and that sexual desire is governed by a dual control system of accelerators (things that turn a person on) and brakes (things that inhibit desire).

Key Concepts

Dual Control Model: Sexual desire depends on the balance between the accelerator and brake systems in the brain, influenced strongly by context and emotions.

Arousal Non-Concordance: The body’s physical response and the brain’s perception of arousal can differ, especially in women.

Context Matters: Emotional and cultural contexts, including stress, trust, and body image, profoundly affect sexual wellbeing and desire.

Sexual Variability: Women’s sexual experiences and anatomy show vast natural variation; "normal" is highly individual.

Sex-Positive Perspective: The book promotes acceptance of one’s sexual self and encourages nonjudgmental awareness and self-compassion.